September 13 – Solitude and Inner Chaos
A monk who does not know the battle within has not yet begun to pray. Abba Evagrius
Gregg’s Reflection
Henri Nouwen observed that when we step into solitude, we often discover a storm of anxieties, memories, and fears that we had been masking with constant activity. This can be so disturbing that we rush back into busyness rather than face the turbulence within. Yet the way forward is not escape, but a gentle willingness to remain still in God’s presence.
In my own practice of silence, I have often been surprised by what rises to the surface. Old feelings of shame, unresolved conflicts, or anxious thoughts suddenly appear when the noise subsides. At first, this felt like failure in prayer, but over time I came to see it as grace — God was showing me what needed to be healed.
The gift of solitude is that it allows us to bring our chaos into the light of God’s love. Rather than being ruled by hidden fears, we slowly learn to name them, hold them before God, and allow love to transform them. Silence does not guarantee serenity, but it does offer the path to freedom.
Scripture
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.
Psalm 37:7
The fruit of righteousness will be peace; its effect will be quietness and confidence forever.
Isaiah 32:17
Ancient Quotes
A monk who does not know the battle within has not yet begun to pray.
Abba Evagrius, Sayings of the Desert Fathers
Silence is the mystery of the age to come, but words are instruments of this world.
Isaac of Nineveh, Ascetical Homilies, Homily 64
Modern Quotes
The purpose of the divine therapy is the healing of the roots of all our problems… to transform our attitudes and, indeed, the whole of our human nature into the mind and heart of Christ.
Thomas Keating, Invitation to Love, p. 51–52
As soon as we are alone, inner chaos opens up in us… We often use the outer distractions to shield ourselves from the interior noises. This makes the discipline of solitude all the more important.
Henri Nouwen, Making All Things New
O Lord, sea of love and goodness, let me not fear too much the storms and winds of my daily life, and let me know there is ebb and flow but the sea remains the sea.
Henri Nouwen, Nouwen Society Daily Devotion, 8/31/20
Journaling Prompts
- What rises up in you when you sit in silence?
- How do you usually respond when inner chaos surfaces — do you face it or flee it?
- What might God be trying to show you in the noise beneath your silence?
- How can you allow solitude to become a place of healing rather than fear?
Go deeper into this week’s theme:
Read the full Week 37 Reflection: Psycho/Spiritual Work