Week Sixteen: False Self/True Self. April 16 – The Masks We Wear
How can you draw close to God when you are far from your own self? Meister Eckhart
Gregg’s Reflection
To navigate our world, we must develop an ego. To find something we can do that people will pay for allows us to move beyond survival. Yet the ego craves control, and seeks constant affirmation. Our opportunity is to go deeper, to move beyond the false self of ego and find the true self of soul. Wade in with me.
In my years of coaching and ministry, I’ve noticed that nearly everyone develops a set of strategies for being in the world. They might take the form of being the “fixer,” the “performer,” the “nice one,” or the “tough one.” At first, these strategies can help us navigate the uncertainties of childhood or the demands of adult life. But over time, they can harden into masks—an image of ourselves that feels safe but isn’t the whole truth.
The problem with masks is that they both protect and imprison. They filter what we allow others to see and, just as tragically, what we allow ourselves to see. While they might shield us from rejection, they also keep us from the intimacy and freedom we long for. Theologians and mystics have long called this constructed identity the “False Self,” the self built on approval, achievement, and control.
The True Self, by contrast, is not something we manufacture; it is our essence, created in the image of God. We were born with it, but we learn to cover it over in our attempts to navigate the world. The spiritual journey is not about polishing the mask but removing it—allowing God’s grace to restore us to the image He placed within us from the beginning.
Scripture
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23–24
Ancient Quotes
How can you draw close to God when you are far from your own self?
Meister Eckhart
Modern Quotes
The false self is the self we develop in our own likeness, in the image of the world, and according to our own disordered desires. The true self is the self we find in Christ, hidden with Him in God.
Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation, p. 35
The false self is deeply invested in maintaining control and winning approval. The true self trusts that who it is in God is enough.
Richard Rohr, Immortal Diamond
The beginning of freedom is the realization that you are not the possessing, controlling self. The True Self is not grasped but received.
Thomas Keating, Invitation to Love, p. 87
Journaling Prompts
- What “mask” do you find yourself wearing most often in different settings?
- How has your mask protected you—and how has it limited you?
- What would it take for you to trust that your true self is enough?
- Where do you see God inviting you to remove the mask this week?
👉 Go deeper into this week’s theme:
Read the full Week 16 Reflection: False Self/True Self