Week Thirty-Two: People-Pleasing. August 6 – The Snare of Approval
If I pray to God that all men should approve of my conduct, I should find myself a penitent at the door of each one. Amma Sarah
Gregg’s Reflection
One of the most common challenges I find in coaching people is their tendency to be a people pleaser. However, that trait takes our focus off God and places it on other people, trapping us in an impossible situation, trying to please everyone. Read on to see how this unfolds.
I’ve seen in my coaching and ministry work how deeply people long for approval. Sometimes it begins in childhood—when love or affirmation was given only for achievement, performance, or compliance. That pattern grooves itself into the soul, and without noticing it, we carry it forward into adulthood.
The snare of approval can look harmless on the surface. Who doesn’t like to be praised? But when it becomes the well we keep going back to for our identity, it traps us. Like an addiction, the good feeling fades quickly, and soon we’re looking for the next “hit” of affirmation to feel okay about ourselves.
God’s Word speaks plainly about this danger: putting our trust in human applause turns our hearts away from Him. The invitation today is to notice how approval-seeking shows up in your life, and to return to the deeper well—God’s unwavering delight in you as His beloved child.
Scripture
Stop trusting in mere humans, who have but a breath in their nostrils. Why hold them in esteem?
Isaiah 2:22
Do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who cannot save.
Psalm 146:3
Ancient Quotes
If I pray to God that all men should approve of my conduct, I should find myself a penitent at the door of each one, but I shall rather pray that my heart may be pure towards all.
Amma Sarah, Celtic Daily Prayer, Book Two, p. 1428
Modern Quotes
People pleasing is a prison. It keeps us from speaking truth to our friends because we are scared to offend. It prevents us from preaching the gospel to those who oppose it. It makes us more devoted to fitting into our various subcultures than to being shaped by the infallible Word of God.
Amy Dimarcangelo, Let Jesus Set You Free from People Pleasing, The Gospel Coalition
Journaling Prompts
- When have you found yourself longing for human approval more than God’s approval?
- How does seeking affirmation from others keep you from living in freedom?
- What steps can you take today to anchor your worth in God rather than in the applause of people?
Go deeper into this week’s theme:
Read the full Week 32 Reflection: People-Pleasing